Fortunately, this is a parody.

Amazon Launches New Social Network Called “Pricekut”

Customers Can Now See and Comment on the Contents of Other Customers’ Shopping Carts…

“We’ve opened up two things to make Pricekut work,” announced Jeff Bezos, Amazon’s CEO. “First, for members of Pricekut, the recommendation engine will now tell you who among your network of friends actually bought or simply looked at an item in our store. Second, we’ve opened up shopping carts to all, enabling people to send instant-messaging-style comments on the contents of others’ carts or, if they feel like it, buying one or more items in the cart as gifts!”

New Pricekut members are invited to fill out an extensive profile before they can begin participating in the network. The profile includes information such as first name, last name, home address, work address, social security number, race, skin color, hair color, dental records, identifying birthmarks, arrest record, political party affiliations, birth date, gender, sexual orientation, mother’s maiden name, father’s mother’s maiden name, grandmother’s maiden name, full medical history, current health insurance provider and all previous providers and their addresses and phone numbers, favorite music, favorite television shows, favorite books, least favorite music, least favorite televsion shows, least favorite books, favorite and least favorite movies, religious affiliation, gradeschool, high school, and college transcripts, car make, model, VIN, and license plate number, and driver’s license number. Once users have filled out the form and read and agreed to the 93-page-long terms of service agreement, they can begin participating in the network.

[via David Weinberger]

[To the tune of Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan, “Allah, Mohammed, Char, Yaar,” from the album Shahen-Shah.]